The “51st State” and Perpetual Motion Have Something in Common: Sane People Don’t Talk About Them

 

 By Don Curren

                                                                


Imagine the following scenario.

The CEO of a massive company that dominates all the markets it’s in holds a news conference and announces, in all seriousness, that he has invented a perpetual motion machine.

The reporters who have been on the science beat for a while chuckle, turn off their tape recorders and put away their notebooks. They stay at the news conference, though, in expectation of some laughs and free coffee and pastries afterwards.

The general assignment reporters might be skeptical. But in view of the CEO’s prominence, they stay and take notes and collect the press kits afterwards.

Upon their return to their newsroom, their editors chuckle just like the science reporters did.

They tell the reporters to spike the story. Or at least to phone up some physicists at the local university to debunk the CEO’s claims and put their quotes high up in the piece.

The gaggle of “influencers” and “podcasters” also at the news conference react differently. They post excited, fawning, uncritical pieces to their massive audiences, if they haven’t already live-streamed the entire news conference.

But in mainstream discourse, the idea the CEO had achieved perpetual motion would soon dissipate, perhaps retaining an afterlife as a punchline for late-night talk show hosts and the subject for some appropriately outrageous memes.

Now let’s tweak the scenario slightly.

In this timeline, the CEO adds that his perpetual motion machine can also “teleport” matter from one location to another, just like the transporter in Star Trek, only more “beautiful.”

And he’s going to use that capacity to teleport a squad of 19-year-old engineers into the buildings of one of his competitors, a successful but much smaller rival whose campus is located right next door.

Their orders will be to engage in wholesale rape and pillage, destroying the other company as a stand-alone entity and plundering whatever assets he wants to take.

He adds that his competitor isn’t a “real company,” that the separation of their assets is based on some “imaginary” legal fictions, says its natural role is to be a subsidiary of his company, and tells sundry and assorted other lies about it.

After the takeover, the rival company will continue exist, but only as a “cherished” subsidiary.

What should the media people – real journalists and influencers alike -  say about the CEO’s statement in this scenario?

I would suggest they should not report on any details, particularly the ideas that the smaller company can simply be annexed and doesn’t really exist.

I think, both in headlines and in the body of their stories, they should confine themselves to reporting the CEO was threatening the smaller company, or trying to bully or intimidate it, without going into any of the egregious details.

In both instances, the CEO’s basic assertions conflict with the fundamental laws of physics, and reporting on them as if they were fact would be doing a disservice to readers.

Unless you’ve been deep underground or sequestered in the Arizona desert in preparation for some deluded billionaire’s lamebrained attempt to colonize Mars, the scenarios I’ve outlined are intended to parallel Trump’s campaign of intimidation against Canada.

Here, in what we reluctantly call the “real world,” I believe real journalists and the pretend kind – influencers and podcasters – should abstain from reporting Trump’s references to unilaterally annexing Canada.

The notion of it becoming the “51st State” should be treated in the same way as the reporters would treat the CEO’s patently absurd assertions about perpetual motion in either of my scenarios.

That’s because Trump’s conception of “annexing” Canada and it becoming the “51st State” contradicts the logic of real-world geopolitics almost as completely as perpetual motion defies the logic of physics.

Canadian Foreign Minister Melanie Joly took precisely the right stance at the meeting of G7 foreign ministers in La Malbaie, Quebec last week, when she told US Secretary of State Marc Rubio that annexing Canada was not a thing.

“What I said to the secretary is Canada's sovereignty is not up to debate, period," she said at the closing news conference of the G7 foreign ministers meeting. 

"There's no argument, there's no conversation about it, there's no need to talk about it," she said.

Rubio attempted to depict it as a “disagreement.”

"There's a disagreement between the president's position and the position of the Canadian government," he said.

It’s not a disagreement. It’s a non-sequitur.

We should respond to Americans talking of annexation the same way we would respond to Americans telling us that they had managed to square the circle, or had proven that light, “injected directly into the body” would cure COVID-19, or had found a principled Republican.

Trump talks that way he does about Canada because he doesn’t live in the same world we live in, whether that’s regarding science, history, sociology, or politics, domestic or global.

As far as I can discern, Trump’s world view is similar to that of a student in Grade 5 or 6, a child around 10 or so, which would be broadly compatible with the average reading level of adult Americans.

It’s a simple, one-dimensional world view with big objects and bright lights, simplistic dichotomies and broad definitions, but no nuance or complexity.

Like a lot of 10-years who think they’re being clever, Trump sometimes seizes on one aspect of a complex situation that seems peculiar or interesting to him

He notices for instance, that borders are just lines artificially drawn on maps.

Trump then mistakenly construes from fact that borders are socially constructed the idea that they don’t really exist and can simply be erased.

(I wonder if thinks the border between the US and Mexico is different from the border between Canada and the US because it follows a geographical feature, the Rio Grande River, rather than the 49th parallel.)

 All that Trump has really demonstrated is that he doesn’t understand that a border is complex entity, a network or assemblage of things both physical and mental.

It includes a line on a map and the treaty that created it, but also the broad conventions and agreements that sustains the international order, and physical things like the border guards and customs and immigration agents that staff it.

It also incorporates loyalties of the people who live on either side of in, including those in the respective militaries.

Only a simpleton would think that could just be “erased” at his behest.

The fact that borders and nations and treaties are socially constructed points to a significant difference between Trump’s belligerent posturing toward Canada and my imagined CEO announcing his perpetual motion machine.

The physical laws that make a perpetual motion machine impossible are not socially constructed. The international order that creates borders and nations and agreements between them is.

That does mean those entities don’t exist or can be altered at some demented president’s whim.

It does mean, though, that they can be altered, over time, by the belief systems of the people who participate in them.

As this may be in part why Trump keeps repeating his absurdities about Canada.

By braying away about them loudly and repeatedly, Trump could theoretically change the underpinnings of the international order by eroding the belief systems that sustain it.

It’s a Big Lie that, repeated often enough, comes at least partially true.

I don’t know if that reflects a “method” to Trump’s madness or it’s just plain madness, but, in a sense, it doesn’t really matter. The net effect, an attempt to undermine the autonomy and sovereignty of another national and its peoples, is the same.

That’s another reason I don’t believe journalists – or anyone else really – should attach any credibility to Trump and his minions’ non-sequiturs about Canada by repeating them as if they were legitimate conversational points.

 It’s an awkward position for me.

When I was a working journalist, I always believed in the policy of “give ‘em enough rope.” I believed reporting people’s nonsensical statements as fully – and accurately – as possible would reveal to readers their inherent lack of sense.

But the last few years have demonstrated that people’s capacity to believe in absurd ideas and narratives – and then act on them - is almost inexhaustible.

So perhaps it’s best to convey the essence of Trump’s stance – to bully and belittle long-standing ally and friend – without delving into the impossible visions conjured up by his addled thought process.

That might help ensure, in a small way, that the border remains in place.

And becomes, as well as the dividing line between two increasingly divergent countries, the place where the nonsense finally stops.

Comments